Girls, I don't know what's wrong, and I hate being negative on here but I promised everyone I would be honest on here so I am going to be!
I woke up this morning, made myself a cup of coffee, and then headed to the gym. I decided to weigh myself again this morning, simply because I'm curious as to how this new meal plan is working with my body. Prior to stepping on that scale, however, I did feel MUCH larger than yesterday (because apparently I can double my weight overnight? Thanks ED.) Well...turns out I am NOW at my lowest weight. I lost some more, which scares me SO much. I have been eating SO much more and exercising less, and I haven't even been hungry (it's been YEARS since I can say that) yet the scale says I'm down.
Well, you can bet your bottom dollar that I marched right on out of that gym. The girl who swiped me in must have thought I was crazy because I had JUST gotten there. Oh well, Sunday is supposed to be the day of rest right?
Well I've been eating according to the plan again, and I just feel miserable. I'm exhausted and unmotivated and just randomly got extremely home sick. I am just frustrated with my lack of friends and my lack of any form of motivation to get out. I literally reached a point where I started tearing up while talking to my roommate about it (who is extremely close to her family, and home sick as well).
I was trying to push past it and get some homework done when my mom IM's me. Now, I know we don't really have a good relationship but I miss her regardless and wanted her to know. She asked me how I was doing and I simply responded:
"I've only been here a week and I'm already missing home!
I'm not having that good of a day"
I was really hoping she would ask me why, or say SOMETHING to make me feel better, but instead she just said:
"i'm sorry to hear that.
hope it gets better for you
2 more questions and i'll let you go
1. did you get my im about keeping your book receipts (even from last semester)? We need them for taxes"
=/ I'm really upset right now. I just wanted her to sound like she cared, but I told her I wanted to talk to her later and we'll see how that works out.
I don't want to sound miserable or self absorbed or anything! I just want comfort in my life. From anyone...