I'm sorry I wasn't able to update this last night. I was planning on coming back after the interview and updating everyone, but after I showered I literally passed out! Yesterday was an incredibly busy and long day, and I'm SO happy that friday has come and I have a chance to breathe!
Onto the interview, shall we?
It went extremely well! The girl who interviewed me (Julie) was an absolute doll! She was so sincere and genuine, and made me feel as comfortable as possible. However, she did ask me a few questions that really made me think...and I actually couldn't answer! At least, not on the spot! All-in-all I think it went really well, and she's even going to send me the article before it's published to make sure she didn't include any information that I wasn't comfortable with! How great is she?! Oh...and despite the awkwardness...she let me snap a photo of her for you lovely ladies:
Isn't she cute?! (And no Julie, I'm not just saying that because I know you're reading this =P )
She actually said something that was so inspiring. She was really interested in how I coped with college and my peers and basically just societies push for thinness and dieting. I talked to her a little about how it's been difficult, but something that I have to learn to live with and she mentioned that even though she's never cared about her weight, and that she's happy with who she is, she can understand how much emphasis society puts on girls to look "perfect". Honestly, I respect and admire her SO much for being so confident in her own skin. I mean, she has no reason not to be! And neither do any of us.
She actually mentioned two things that I wanted to expand on a little. I'm not exactly sure where I'm going with these, as I'm thinking while typing. However, I'm going to give it a shot!
1. Towards the end of the interview, she stated that she was surprised by how positive I was, and she never would have thought that I had an eating disorder. This really bothered me. Not in the "why did you say that, I'm so upset at you!" sort of way, but in the "that really shows you that people don't know much about eating disorders"- way. No wonder people throw around the label "anorexic" effortlessly, and in a negative fashion. It's because people don't KNOW how wonderful and genuine and beautiful the real sufferers are. They only know the celebrities and the few people who go on talk shows who are at the very worst of their disease; and who can be positive at that point?! That truly inspires me to put myself out there and show everyone that you can't place a face or a label on anorexia (or any eating disorder). We are real people, with a drive to recover and a past that will always haunt us- but that doesn't mean we aren't role models, positive thinkers, the next Einstein (=P), whatever!
2. Compliments. My absolute biggest fear (sort of). So why am I so afraid of them? Well, thanks to my dear Julie...I realized it. About half-way through our talk, she complimented me on my writing, and mentioned that I should write for them as well (with a little awkward laugh thrown in there as well....but a genuine compliment never-the-less). I, of course, mentioned that I didn't think so, but thanked her regardless. And then it hit me. I'm scared of letting people down. I'm scared that the next time she reads my blog, she will realize that I'm actually a terrible writer, and she was wrong and never should have mentioned it to me. I'm scared that I'm going to lose my ability to write and everything is going to go downhill. I'm scared of failure.
WHAT IS THAT?!?! I have always written this way, and I have always gotten compliments (despite denying them!). If someone compliments my hair, it's always going to be my hair. It isn't suddenly going to fall off, or turn into a fro. It's MINE and I can do WHATEVER I like with it...even if it doesn't satisfy everyone. I write because I enjoy it. I don't write to impress. If I wanted to write-to-impress I would be in journalism or something similar to that! I need to learn to accept the compliments, and run with them...not away from them!
Girls- I hope you have an AMAZING friday! Do what you need to do, push forward, smile, and LOVE YOURSELF! You deserve it!